I picked up Karyn’s ashes today. In arranging for her to be cremated, determining when it would happen and when I could collect her ashes, the word consistently used was “remains.”
How would you like to receive your wife’s remains?
Your wife’s remains will be available at…
Please sign for your wife’s remains here… and here…
The word seems fantastically off the mark. What I just picked up are not her remains. They are not what she left behind.
What Karyn left behind are two kids with brilliant heads on their shoulders and beautiful hearts in their chests. She left family and friends — many of whom are both — who grew because of her, learning things about themselves and each other. She left a husband who, thanks to her, realized just how deeply and fully he could love.
Karyn left in all of us the permission to be courageous, honest and loving, and taught us how to do it through her inspiring example.
Her remains are not in the container I picked up today. They are in everything I see. They surround me and remind me of her in a million different ways.
I am Karyn’s remains. You are Karyn’s remains.